12 Guidelines For a Loving Long-Term Relationship!

Have you ever noticed there are some couples who seem to float through their relationship? They always seem to be smiling and looking at each other with love in their eyes.

What is their secret?
Okay so they may be the most special of soul mates which are called twin flames but in order for them to deal with the stuff life throws up they must be aware of some important guidelines.

1. Both partners need to be responsible for the protection and nurturing of the love they share. Love should never be taken for granted, as is the case when a partner has an affair. They break the bond of love and too late realize the damage it has done. Guard your precious love with your life.

Never stand in the way of your partners dreams
2. Always encourage your partner in anything they want to do. If they want to be a rock star or a doctor you have to let them walk their path and discover their life purpose. So many partners stand in the way of their loved ones dream because they fear it will take them away from what they have together. This is the part where you have to set them free to walk their own walk. If you try to hold them back they will not thank you for it and slowly love will die as resentment and regret sets in.

Fight with sensitivity
3. Fight fair when you have a disagreement and never make personal attacks on each other. That bubble you walk around in when you are in love will burst very easily if your partner in an immature attempt to win a fight tells you he perhaps does not like the way you wear your hair or that you could lose a few pounds. Hurting your partner like this if they are not thick skinned will show them how insensitive you can be and will chip away at the foundation of your love.

Have fun
4. Try to do a lot of fun things together as life can be too serious at times with economies being as shaky as they are. If you have money problems there are always free ways to entertain yourselves. Keep the love alive at all cost.

Spend time alone together
5. Never stop the romantic side of the relationship. Make special dinners with candles and music for each other. Take the time to be together intimately as this is such a perfect expression of love and a great way to forget about the world and its problems for a while. Always make it a special and memorable time. It can get you through good times and bad.

Communicate how you feel
6. Leave the lines of communication open. If you have something on your mind talk it through with your partner. Try not to bottle things up inside, as the outcome is often an explosion of emotion. You want your partner to be your friend as well as your lover so open up to them. A lot of people are afraid to do this as they fear thy will be ridiculed for revealing their inner most thoughts. If this happens then you are with the wrong person. Secrets can be destroyers of relationships so try to always be honest with each other. If the love you have is strong you should be able to ride together through a few storms.

Should we compromise?
7. Most of us hate the word compromise as it takes away the freedom to be ourselves. I do not think you should compromise your life ideals, principles and ethics but when it comes to choosing a new television there is room for concession. Another area you should not compromise is your life path, which includes things like wanting children; a career of choice, religious beliefs and other extremely important needs that stamp who you are. If you surrender to your partner constantly you will not only lose respect for them but yourself also. Some people have a twisted belief that a relationship is one person who controls everything and the other who succumbs to that control.

Let each other breathe.
8. Give each other heaps of space. You were solo before you met each other and though now a couple you still need time to do your own thing. Do not crowd each other as too much of a good thing can be suffocating. Me time is essential for developing our creativity and sense of ourselves. If you find your partner is making unreasonable demands on your time they may be insecure, so try to talk to them about how they are feeling and why. Let them know they have nothing to fear in this relationship but you need time alone. Insecurity caused by past relationships where partners were not kind to each other would have to be one of the major causes of break ups. Sadly people who have been hurt tend to drag their unresolved baggage into every new relationship then wonder why it falls apart. Work through any pain left from a turbulent relationship before you enter a new one.

The in-laws and best friends
9. Make an effort to get on with your lovers friends and family. Sometimes this is a big ask but it can make life a lot easier if you at least try to respect them for who they are. Sometimes friends can get jealous of someone new on the scene especially if they are suddenly taking up time normally reserved for them so try to be sensitive to their feelings and even better make friends with them.

Do you think you own your partner?
10. Treat your partner as an individual not as a possession. They are an individual person with thoughts and real feelings of their own. When you fall in love with someone it does not mean you own them. Jealousy is another killer of relationships. A partner with the affliction can make life a living hell for the person they protest to love. This would be like living in partnership prison where solitary confinement would be the punishment for a partner who is friendly and free.

Love and Respect
11. If you are in love with someone it often follows that you also respect him or her. If you do not then I would question the validity of a partnership like that. For some of us love and respect go hand in hand as even though intimacy with a person you are deeply in love with is beyond words sharing life with a partner who stands for something you hold sacred is as important. This is the problem in a relationship based on lust. The cracks usually start to show after a time as the initial spark wears off and the couple finds there is no shared beliefs or mutual respect.

12. Trusting another person in this world of con artists and liars is a lot to ask of any one. When you are in love you are faced with the daunting prospect of having to trust this new person with your heart. Sometimes trust is betrayed leaving the person who so willingly gave this precious gift thinking that thy can never again cannot trust anyone. A cycle of mistrust begins in every relationship they go into generally causing an eventual break up. I believe that as humans we are not perfect and capable not always on purpose of hurting another human being by an action made in haste. I personally have never cheated on a partner but it does happen. I believe I could forgive one indiscretion but after that you may have a serial cheater on your hands and I for one would finish with them. Trust can be broken in many different ways in a relationship and you have to decide how you will deal with it. If you go through your life not being able to offer your trust you may end up bitter and lonely. My attitude is to let a good thing be and if something happens cross that bridge when you come to it. As I said we are capable of mistakes and it is not always a hanging offence. If you truly love a person who has stolen your trust first try talking about it. Tell them how it made you feel and do not verbally attack them, as this will make them defensive and angry. It is amazing how we blame our partners to find a change in us was instrumental in their negative action. It takes two to tango.

Possibly 7 out of 10 relationships are problematic. An endless disagreement about insecurities, jealousies and different outlooks on love plague these partnerships until love is no longer a reason to stay together. Simple and effective relationship rules can prevent this from happening and give couples who have fallen in love the tools to have happy and fun filled lives together.